Vacation.

I need a vacation. In particular, from my family.

Ever since I have been having a steady stream of income, their lives have been falling apart financially and I have been having to foot some of the bill. Things are so fucked up over there I can't even explain it. I don't even understand it on most days.

I just want to help them. But I still have over $80,000 in debt that I need to pay off. And I need to start saving incase R can't find a job soon enough which, given the economy, is a very real possibility.

I don't know what to do.

< /self-pity vent >

Ahem. Anyway.

R left last night for Atlantic City. He is taking the New Jersey portion of the bar there today. (It is his last day of bar exam!) Whenever R has to leave me, or I have to leave him, to spend the night somewhere else, I always feel a profound sadness. It reminds me of the times when we were living in different cities, and leaving him always meant for weeks, sometimes months. Even though he's not going for weeks or months, that feeling is still there. Habit, I guess.

Because of crazy Atlantic City hotel policies, R had to book two nights, instead of only the one night he needed, so he's staying there tonight, too. So I decided that I am going to take the train to Atlantic City after work and spend the night there with him -- my tiny 12-hour vacation. Because I love him.

But also, because I love hotels. Oh my god, I love hotels. More still, I love amenities.

I am such a cheap date that I am sure even the Sheraton is going to be a pure delight for me. I can see it now, me taking R's hand and dragging him to the bathroom, the closet -- Look, we get free SHAMPOO! It's in little bottles, look it's so cute. It smells like WATERMELON! -- OMG OMG look at these BATHROBES!

And he will say, with a sigh, I know. I was here last night.

To which I will reply, But, but, have you seen the CHANNELS we can get?!

And so forth.

R tells me there's a minibar. I have never seen a minibar in person. I am so excited.

The only thing keeping my excitement in check is the thought of leaving the catz alone. I know it's only for 24 hours, but they are stupid; they don't know how long we'll be gone for. Plus, they are my friends (my stupid, stupid friends), and I would love to see their reaction to hotel rooms, the Atlantic City boardwalk, casinos, etc.

I am going to miss them terribly, but they need to learn how to be alone, right? Can't raise them to be big babies. Big, stupid babies.